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How has your life changed since starting college?

09.06.2025 01:02

How has your life changed since starting college?

Now, I am living 300km away from my family.I miss them.

The fact that groups break up after the first year is correct.

-Hitesha.

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From my daily arguments with dad to missing him.

From fighting with sister on small things to fighting on calls/texting.

Let’s come to the answer.

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It will be a year since I started college, so I thought I should share my experience with you.

In PG, I met 5 other girls from my classroom, and from the start, I kept my expectations low and was sure that I did not fit in with them, so I kept my distance, and my only connection in college was my roommate at that time.She advised me multiple times to hang out with that group. I made it clear to her that it was not right for my well-being to spend time with people with whom I feel uncomfortable.

From watching news at breakfast- to sharing news on calls

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I’ve realized the real value of money.

I witnessed people with no understanding becoming successful simply because they were confident enough to stand on stage and perform.They arrived, performed, and it was finished. Their performance was not that good; it could have been better, yet people applauded as if it were the best.

I am happy I found them, but the scared half of me always reminds me to be ready for heartbreaks, and I don't expect much.

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

I lacked friends in 12th class,I didn’t understand a single thing those teachers were teaching and used youtube and educational subscriptions for learning.

I found amazing mentors in my professors.

All I meant to say is that if you are fully skilled, know everything, and still have no confidence, You will be considered nothing, but if you have confidence, people will see it as a plus, and this will provide a better opportunity for the future.

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made friends

Confidence is the key.

My roommate soon understood this and stopped hanging out with them before it was too late.Now I have a trio: myself, my roommate, and one of the five girls-who faced the same situation as us.Our vibes matched.

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I still have doubts about myself, have a lot to work on my personality and need to work hard. I will keep trying to see positivity around me and I wish you would do the same.

How has your life changed since starting college?

I have never stayed away from home before this but now I live in a pg with the worst management, manage my own chores, and travel alone.

Why would a person always be so tired?

Thanks for reading my answer.

Backstory-

From being at home 24*7 to going home for a few days in 2–3 months.

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I have huge respect for their knowledge and dedication to teaching.I consider myself lucky to be able to learn from such experts in their respective fields.

Going away from that place was my only wish at that time.I had no exposure to the outside world and I knew if I continued my further studies there, I would gain nothing.

Image source- My gallery

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From eating freshly cooked, hot and healthy food prepared by mom with love and care to eating pg’s carelessly made tasteless food.

I’ve become more responsible.

Note- You can skip to the main part.

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For example, many of my collegemates didn’t know what UGC was. The girl who was my senior and was sitting beside me didn’t know that Guide is written by R.K. Narayan. She was going to tick Chetan Bhagat as the answer before I stopped her.

In college, I met many people who were faking behaviors in order to look cool, and they still do. This 'pick me' behavior irritates me the most.

Many people used to believe that I would not be able to do so, but I did.

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I met a lot of fake people and learned how to deal with them.

From bothering mom 24/7 to videocalling mom and describing how my day went.

In 12th, I struggled to focus on my studies.I didn’t want to take the science stream but had to and wasn’t doing well. As if it wasn’t enough my father transferred to some other city and I was not happy with it.

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There are many students who can’t go home frequently because of issues like long distance, travelling issues etc..I can feel their pain.

I felt frustrated, occasionally venting at my family and used to have panic attacks.